Day 47: C'est La Vie? C'est Penible!

*Note: This blog post, believe it or not, was written on time. It is being posted a day late due to technical difficulties. The picture above depicts a "Fail" on the French flag. Why? Read and find out...

Bonjour fellow readers (and that about covers my mastery of the French Language XD).

Why all French all the sudden? It’s simple really...Air France screwed me over this summer, so now I get to rant about it ONLINE :D

But first, a little background info. In case you weren't aware, I was in Germany for most of the summer living with a native family in a small village about 50 kilometers north of Berlin (that’s about 30 miles for all you guys stateside). The trip was life-altering, and I made a number of good friends, a number of unforgettable experiences, and a little more progress mastering the German language (Aber jetzt, ich muss mein Deutsch mehr ueben).

The five week adventure was a wonderful vacation indeed...until I had to leave. The tearful goodbye at Berlin's Tegel Airport was hard enough, but I had no idea what lay ahead of me in terms of getting back home as a sane teenage blogger....(yes, I realize I am already insane, but thats not the point...)

My flight (Air France) was supposed to connect in Paris for the Mid-Atlantic, but mother nature said "HEY NOW, WHERE YOU GOIN BOY!?! Nah-ah, you ain't goin nowhere near Paris...you gonna go be stranded in Lyon son." (Mother nature has a southern accent? Conspiracy....).

Anyways, in case that didn't make sense, my plane was diverted to Lyon (on the other side of France mind you) because of bad weather in Paris. We were grounded in Lyon for three and a half hours, and during that time I was trapped on the plane...(we wouldn't be allowed back on the plane if we left to get fresh air!!!). Worried about what to do when I would miss my connection in Paris, I asked the flight attendant about what to do....and you know what he did? He laughed at me!!!! Me, HaufeCoffee, ruler of YDCoH. How dare he do such a thing? XD.

But seriously, he didn't care for me much at all, and that was really distressing. Luckily, a German woman sitting next to me (I love the German people!) stood up for me and told him how much of a jerk he was for laughing at a stranded teenager whose home was more than 4,000 miles away. Thanks to this kind woman, the attendant apologized and finally helped me with some /useful/ information (instead of the usual "you're stuck in France man...sucks for you.").

Kudos to that German woman...she wins the HaufeCoffee award for "Total Awesomeness in the midst of an International Travel Fiasco".

I finally made it to Paris...and missed my flight by four hours. I was able to make it to the service counter, and after waiting in a DMV style line (I know you all love those), I was able to sort everything out. The next flight would be the following morning, and I'd get a voucher for a free dinner at the airport, a ticket for a hotel stay, and a free breakfast. Things couldn't get much worse right? WRONG!

First of all, the directions to the hotel were small and vague (and conveniently in French), so it took me about 30 minutes to make it there. I walked into the hotel to check in, but the guy there just shook his head and told me: "sorry sir, you're at the Ibis hotel Charles De Gaulle....you want the Ibis hotel /Roissy/."

Dammmmmmmmmmmmmmnit

So then, after catching a second bus taking me about 5 miles from the Airport, I made it to my real hotel, which was (naturally) more sketchy and not as nice as the original hotel. I checked in, got to my room, made an emergency Skype call to the folks to sort out the situation, and before I knew it, it was 10pm.

And I forgot to eat dinner >.<

The free dinner voucher I had received was only valid for the airport, and since the airport was further away from the hotel than I thought it would be....it was a lost cause at this point.

The hotel had a French buffet set up until 10:30, so I went down quickly to get some grub. The buffet consisted of fancy meat loaf and mashed potatoes....yummy :P.

While I was eating, I noticed that the waitress and one of the cooks were looking at me funny, and I got really nervous (I'm stranded in the middle of a foreign country alone, I don't speak the language, and now the natives are staring at me...eeek!). Eventually, the cook came up to me and started rambling about something in French and of course I was completely lost. "Parlez Anglais? (Speak English.)", was the only thing I could squeak out, and I guess he realized I was yet another American, because he left. Next to ramble at me in French was the waitress, and at this point I decided the blank stare would give them the answer they needed (the answer being: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE HELL Y'ALL WANT!!!!). Finally, the waitress pointed at the dessert portion of the buffet and said in broken english "eat dessert?" "No," I firmly replied, and they finally left me alone.....sheesh.

I got up to pay, and suprise suprise, my meal of fancy meatloaf, mashed potatoes, and water cost 19 euros (25 dollars). 19!?!?! I could get a meal like that at KFC for 4 /dollars/. But at the end of the day, I didn't care anymore, and I left as a poorer stranded American. (Lucky for me, I did not eat the dessert....it would have been five euros extra :P).

Thankfully, the night was uneventful, and I woke up the next morning on time and was ready to go. I actually enjoyed the free breakfast I had (sure it didn’t have the good ol' eggs and bacon, but it did feature some delicious Quiche). Maybe I wouldn't have anymore troubles...right?

Nope, the French had one more thing in store for me. I decided to wait for the bus inside the hotel, because waiting at the bus stop alone was a little sketchy. Unfortunately, when the bus approached the empty stop, the driver assumed it was ok to drive right past it. NOT COOL. I bolted through the lobby with my luggage and spun my way through the rotating doors. By the time I was outside, the bus was already pulling way. It took me sprinting down the road, yelling and waving my arms, for the bus to finally stop and pick me up. It was probably the most ridiculous thing I had done in a very long time (and if you know me, that means a /lot/), but in the end I made it, and from there on out I had no troubles. The flight to the Mid-Atlantic was on time, and before I knew it I was back stateside eating a chick-fil-a biscuit...

Just to clarify, I have no hatred toward the French people...in fact, I think their culture is a rather interesting one. However, due to travel inconvenience and a language barrier, my stay in France was most certainly not a fun one. At least it makes for a good story....and blog post :D.

This post has lasted way longer than the norm, so I'm going to leave music recommendations for next time. I hope you enjoyed my French fiasco story...

and remember...

...fly Royal Dutch Airlines or Lufthansa if possible ;).

G'night Interwebs!!!

--HaufeCoffee

P.S.: C'est La Vie? C'est Penible! = That's Life? That's Annoying!

Aber jetzt, ich muss mein Deutsch mehr ueben. = But now, I must practice my German more.